Written by Canterbury Law Group

How to Propose Collaborative Divorce or Mediation to Your Spouse

Want to try collaborative or mediation divorce but are unsure if your spouse will agree to it? The best way to ask for the response you want is as follows.

Spend some time planning what you will say and how you will say it if you decide to suggest mediation or collaboration to your spouse. Here are some recommendations as well as some things to remember not to do.

Writing or Speaking

If you and your spouse get along well enough to speak to each other face-to-face or over the phone, you might be able to suggest mediation or collaborative law by simply talking to your spouse about it. Make the proposal in writing if your spouse has a tendency to respond poorly to your ideas and suggestions during conversations or if you and your spouse don’t get along.

Having the Right Words

Presenting collaborative divorce in a nonjudgmental and neutral manner is important, whether you do it verbally, over the phone, or in writing. Give your spouse information without giving them the impression that they are being pressured or being sold a piece of junk. Consider writing a draft letter and having a reliable friend or advisor review it before sending the finished document to your spouse if you plan to propose mediation or collaboration in writing. If you plan to make the proposal in person or over the phone, prepare your remarks in advance and make some notes. To make sure you strike the right tone and cover all the points you need to make, think about practicing with a friend. Consider giving your spouse any brochures or other printed materials you may have explaining mediation. The same applies to any reliable websites or other sources of information you may have discovered. In this way, as you talk about whether, how, and who to mediate, you and your partner would have the same frame of reference.

Choosing a Particular Mediator

Depending on the specifics of your situation, you might want to start looking for a mediator before bringing up mediation with your spouse or you might want to wait until your spouse can actively participate in the selection process.

Give your spouse your list of potential mediators along with details on their fees and selection criteria if you have already compiled one. This lets your spouse have a say in what happens and sends the message that you are willing to share information. This increases the likelihood that the mediation will begin on a constructive note.

Depending on whether your spouse will perceive your attempt to sway the mediator to your side rather than a neutral request for general information, you should decide whether to get in touch with the potential mediators beforehand. Avoid prior contact with the mediators you want to suggest if you have any doubts about this. Usually, you can learn something about local mediators without actually speaking to them. Then you can inform your spouse of what you’ve learned and reassure them that by initiating contact, you haven’t jeopardized the mediator’s objectivity.

If your spouse is likely to view anyone you recommend with suspicion, suggest mediation in general and offer to take a mediator that your spouse suggests into consideration. You can still research local mediators so that you can decide on your spouse’s suggestion in a well-informed manner, but you can also keep your spouse from feeling railroaded or dictated to.

There is nothing wrong with giving your spouse a brochure or other information listing local attorneys with experience in collaborative practice if you are proposing a collaborative divorce and neither you nor your spouse has hired an attorney. However, unless your spouse specifically requests it, avoid recommending specific attorneys for your spouse.

Need a Family Lawyer in Scottsdale?

Our experienced family law attorneys will work with you to obtain the best possible outcome in your situation.  As proven trial lawyers in family court, you can trust the firm to represent you fully so you can move on with your life and your children. Call today for your initial consultation. Our family lawyers can help with divorce litigation, collaborative divorcedivorce mediationchild custodylegal guardianshippaternityprenuptial agreements, and more.

Written by Canterbury Law Group

How to Divorce Without Going to Court

How to Divorce Without Going to Court

Learn about the techniques that can assist you avoid having to appear in court throughout your divorce.

Divorce Alternatives to the Traditional Process

Let’s start with a disclaimer: while some states enable you to acquire a divorce ruling without ever entering a courtroom, others require you to appear in front of a judge. However, if you can settle your disputes ahead of time, your court appearance will only take a few minutes, rather than the hours or even days that a contested divorce trial will take. You and your spouse can try to resolve your differences on your own, or you can use one of the Alternative Dispute Resolution techniques (ADR).

Solving Problems by Yourself

If you and your husband are on friendly terms, you might list your marital concerns and try to come to an agreement on each one. It’s a good idea to do some preliminary research on the topics you’ll be discussing so you don’t forget anything. Divorce concerns typically include any or all of the following:

  • partition of assets and debts
  • spousal support or alimony
  • child custody, as well as
  • support for children

You should have a divorce lawyer formalize your settlement by producing a Property Settlement Agreement once you’ve reached an agreement on all of your divorce-related concerns (also known as a Marital Settlement Agreement). In addition to the terms you’ve agreed to, this will usually include significant legal clauses. Keep in mind, however, that you and your spouse cannot employ the same lawyer; you should both have your own counsel evaluate the contract on your behalf.

Choosing a Mediator for Your Divorce

Mediation is a prominent ADR technique. Mediators are qualified professionals who assist spouses in resolving their conflicts (usually lawyers or child custody experts). The couple will prepare material and documents (such as tax records) ahead of time and meet with the mediator as many times as required to reach an agreement. The idea is to limit the parameters of the settlement to a written agreement.

Mediation is usually less stressful than going through a contested divorce. Sessions are usually held in the mediator’s office and are relatively informal. Although the couple can have attorneys present, it is not needed, which adds to the mediation’s cost-effectiveness. (Having attorneys there can actually be unhelpful at times, especially if the attorney is confrontational.) You will have to pay the mediator, although this is normally split between the parties.

Divorce Through Collaboration

Another type of ADR is collaborative divorce. The purpose is similar to mediation in that it is to establish an agreement, but it is structured differently.

A mediator or other third party is not involved in a collaborative divorce. Rather, each couple has an attorney and participates in “four-way” meetings in order to establish an agreement. Collaborative law attorneys often have specialized training in this area. In order to keep them focused on the settlement, most—if not all—states prohibit them from representing the spouses in future court cases if the negotiations fail.

Collaborative law is based on the concept of working as a “team.” To establish an agreement, all players are required to work together. Any professionals involved in the process (such as accountants, property appraisers, and child psychologists if there is a custody dispute) must be impartial and accepted by both parties.

If you’d rather have an attorney represent you throughout the settlement process, you’re more likely to choose collaborative divorce over mediation. But keep in mind that if you can’t come to an agreement, you’ll have to start the entire divorce procedure over with new lawyers. This could result in a huge increase in costs, as these new lawyers will have to learn the case from the ground up.

Arbitration in Divorce

Divorce arbitration is another weapon in the ADR toolbox, and it’s frequently used by couples who don’t think they’ll be able to settle their disagreement but want someone to make a decision outside of the traditional court system. Unlike mediation and collaborative divorce, arbitration’s purpose is for the arbitrator to decide the case and give a ruling, similar to what a court would do after a trial. (Divorce arbitration may not be available in all states; consult a local attorney to see if it is used in your area.)

The advantages of arbitration versus a court trial are numerous. The arbiter is chosen by you and your spouse. You cannot choose your judge in court. You can also choose to relax the standard rules of proof. For example, rather of having a witness attend in person, you can agree to accept the presentation of a witness’s sworn written statement. You’ll also collaborate to define the dates, times, and length of your arbitration sessions. That’s a luxury you won’t find in court, where disputed divorces can drag on for over a year and you can waste hours each time you go waiting for a judge to show up.

The most significant disadvantage of arbitration is that the judgement is final and binding. You usually can’t appeal unless the arbitrator is acting improperly. With a court trial, it’s nearly a given that you’ll be able to appeal. You’ll also have to pay the arbiter in addition to your lawyers. This can be costly, especially in complex circumstances.

Is it necessary for you to appear in court?

You must submit a divorce petition or complaint with the court to formally end the marriage, even if your case has been settled. The divorce is usually based on no-fault grounds (reasons), such as “irreconcilable disagreements,” by whichever partner files the case. You must submit the relevant papers and forms in states that do not require a court presence. These are frequently seen on the court’s website. A judge will approve the settlement and issue a final divorce judgment if everything is in order.

If your state needs a court appearance, you’ll notify the court clerk that your divorce case has been resolved once you’ve completed the initial divorce filing process. The case will be marked “uncontested,” and you will be given an expedited court date. In most cases, you’ll appear in front of a judge for around fifteen minutes, verifying the grounds for the divorce and answering basic questions about the settlement agreement. Again, the court’s website is likely to provide useful procedural information.

Regardless of which path you choose for your divorce, you should seek the advice of an expert family law attorney who can assist you throughout the process.

Need a Divorce Lawyer in Scottsdale or Phoenix?

As proven legal counsel in family court, we have a network of Arizona attorneys, expert witnesses, mediators, tax specialists, estate planners, financial planners, child specialists, real property appraisers, adult and child therapists and parenting coordinators who are here for you if you ever need them. Our lawyersdivorce mediators and collaborative divorce attorneys in Scottsdale are here to make your divorce less stressful and keep you in control and the costs contained. Call today for an initial consultation at 480-744-7711 or [email protected]. Our family lawyers can also help with divorce litigation, child custodylegal guardianshippaternityprenuptial agreements, and more.

*This information is not intended to be legal advice. Please contact Canterbury Law Group today to learn more about your personal legal needs.

How To Divorce Your Wife And Keep Everything
Written by Canterbury Law Group

Top 10 Questions to Ask a Divorce Lawyer

Top 10 Questions to Ask aDivorce Lawyer

If you’re going through a divorce and need an attorney, keep in mind that you don’t have to select the first one you come across. One of the most essential divorce-related decisions you’ll make is selecting the best lawyer to represent you.

Even if a friend or another lawyer has recommended a family law attorney, you should still do your research; examine the attorney’s credentials and make sure he or she has the expertise to handle your case.

There are many lawyers, and many of them advertise themselves as “family law” or “divorce” attorneys. Family law, on the other hand, is a specialization involving complicated legal principles that take time and experience to grasp. There are even more subspecialties within the field of family law, like child custody law, international custody law, guardianship, and a branch of the law regarding Qualified Domestic Relations Orders (QDROs), which are special orders that must be used to distribute certain types of retirement benefits.

Divorce also has a number of financial implications, including:

  • standards for financial disclosure between spouses
  • Before and during the divorce, restraining orders ban spouses from changing beneficiary designations or transferring assets.
  • alimony is a phrase that refers to a (how to calculate income available for alimony and the special factors courts consider when determining setting payments)
  • support for children (how to calculate child support in your state)
  • Property and assets, such as real estate, collectibles, venture capital interests, stock option portfolios, goodwill, or other company interests, are divided, and
  • the distribution of pension benefits

There is a large body of law that applies to these concerns (which varies from state to state). The government and/or the courts constantly alter or overturn these laws, so you’ll need to choose an attorney who is knowledgeable with the latest regulations and cases that pertain to your divorce.

You might feel comfortable selecting a less experienced family law attorney if you have a basic case with few financial difficulties and no children. If you’re going through a disputed divorce with significant assets, extensive financial concerns, or a complex custody fight, you should choose a family law attorney that specializes in family law and has experience with the issues you’re dealing with. See our article, Hiring a Divorce Lawyer, for advice on how to hire a divorce lawyer to handle part or all of your divorce case.

Ten Things to Ask a Divorce Lawyer

We’ve put up a list of questions you might want to ask a family law attorney during your initial consultation. These may assist you in determining whether or not this lawyer is appropriate for your case.

1. Do you specialize in divorces or do you handle them as part of your general practice? How long have you been working in the field of family law? How many cases have you handled involving family law? Is it true that you’re a “qualified family law specialist”?

2. What is your plan for dealing with my case? How long will it take for my case to be resolved?

3. How long does it take you to respond calls? In the event of an emergency, how can I contact you? What do you consider an emergency situation?

4. Will you be working on my case with anyone else in your office? What kind of background do they have? Is it possible for me to meet them?

5. What method will you use to bill me? How much do you charge per hour? Do you bill for the time I spend interacting with other lawyers, paralegals, and/or secretaries? If so, what is the rate of increase? What is the amount of your retainer up front?

6. What other costs (besides your own) do you plan to incur (for example, for private investigators, forensic accountants, physicians, and/or psychiatrists), and how will you bill me for them?

7. What do you think the total cost of this divorce will be? (Don’t be surprised if most divorce attorneys refuse to answer this question because the cost of the divorce is heavily influenced by the level of contention in your case.) The way attorneys respond to this question, on the other hand, may assist you assess them. An honest attorney will frequently respond that estimating fees in advance is tough. If an attorney offers you a very low fee, it’s possible that they’re just attempting to gain your business).

8. Do you allow me to bargain with my spouse directly? How can I keep my divorce costs down? Is there anything I can do on my own to reduce the amount you’ll charge me?

9. How do you think a judge would rule in my case, based on what you know about it?

10. What can you do to assist me in better understanding the tax implications of the decisions I’ll need to make?

Need a Divorce Lawyer in Scottsdale or Phoenix?

As proven legal counsel in family court, we have a network of Arizona attorneys, expert witnesses, mediators, tax specialists, estate planners, financial planners, child specialists, real property appraisers, adult and child therapists and parenting coordinators who are here for you if you ever need them. Our lawyersdivorce mediators and collaborative divorce attorneys in Scottsdale are here to make your divorce less stressful and keep you in control and the costs contained. Call today for an initial consultation at 480-744-7711 or [email protected]. Our family lawyers can also help with divorce litigation, child custodylegal guardianshippaternityprenuptial agreements, and more.

*This information is not intended to be legal advice. Please contact Canterbury Law Group today to learn more about your personal legal needs.

Written by Canterbury Law Group

Sneaky Divorce Tactics

Sneaky Divorce Tactics

At the time, dirty ways to get back at your soon-to-be-ex may seem like a smart idea. Retaliating for your ex’s wrongdoings may provide you with a sense of satisfaction in knowing that you are exacting justice or giving your ex what he or she deserves.

However, the truth is that these dirty divorce techniques rarely benefit the perpetrator and nearly usually result in hostility. Dirty divorce methods can inspire the other side in the same way that the bombing of Pearl Harbor roused a sleeping giant. During your divorce processes, fight the impulse to be vindictive, because you may discover that the joke is on you. Here are some instances of things you should not do:

1. Don’t give him anything.

A female client is considering leaving her husband’s home. It appears that if she tells her husband that she wants to leave, he will stop her. It has to be done behind his back. She is furious with him and wants to get even with him, so when she leaves, she takes everything in the house with her. He has nothing to sit on and nothing to cook with when he goes home. She believes she’s shown him something, but all she’s done is provoke him and throw down the gauntlet for all-out war.

2. Cancel all of your credit cards.

I represented a mother of three whose husband, a doctor, was having an affair with a nurse. Both had engaged lawyers, but my client preferred to wait before suing her husband for infidelity in the hopes of reaching an amicable resolution.

My client had just returned from a lengthy journey with one of her kids and was about to pay for gas when her card was rejected. Her spouse, who earns around $1 million a year, chose to terminate all of her credit cards without warning. To say the least, the good doctor procured an adultery complaint and a temporary hearing in which the judge was apprised of his actions.

3. Obtain his dismissal.

Offended spouses’ eagerness to get their ex fired or in trouble with the IRS or, in one case, the Securities and Exchange Commission never ceases to astonish me. What could they be thinking while they’re simultaneously attempting to get enough money from their spouse to make ends meet? What a case of shooting oneself in the foot!

4. Turning Off the Power.

This is undoubtedly one of the nastier divorce ruses. Many people have called me to say that their phone, power, or cable has been switched off at their home without warning. Such an approach simply leads to a downward spiral of attacks and counterattacks.

5. Inform the Paramour’s Partner.

When an affair is discovered, a common reaction is to phone the paramour’s spouse and tell them everything. As a result, that spouse may launch an alienation of affection lawsuit, putting the marital assets at danger. Clearly, this is an extremely self-destructive decision. (There are situations when sharing this information is beneficial, but this should be done by the lawyer, not the client.)

6. Take the kids out of state.

At the time, such a move seemed like a great way to get even with your spouse. However, some cases show that it can be a good method to get a judge to grant custody to your husband in exchange for your bad behavior. It is considered kidnapping in several places.

7. De-clutter your bank accounts.

While this may bring some temporary relief and security, it may also result in an emergency hearing and the costs associated with it. It may also imbue the perpetrator with an unjust taint that they may never be able to escape. (There are situations when this may be essential, but only with counsel’s guidance and for very good reason.)

8. File a Child Abuse Complaint.

I believe that few people consciously make false complaints of abuse, but it is all too common for people in the throes of divorce to stretch regular events to their advantage. This is something that judges are well aware of. Allow no one to speak to your child if there is a risk of abuse, and bring them to a professional who is trained in interviewing children for abuse. Abuse allegations can be made in both directions, so tread carefully before throwing stones. Allow the experts to handle it.

9. Make your spouse feel humiliated.

Many people wish to teach their spouse a lesson by having summons or subpoenas served on them at work or in other humiliating locations. I’m aware of one situation in which a woman requested that the process server serve her husband immediately before he boarded a plane for an overseas hunting trip. Such gestures may provide gratification, but they can also lead to revenge and escalation of the conflict. Remember that they will one day have the power to embarrass you in the same way they embarrassed you.

10. Just because you can, pull the trigger.

Many times over the course of a divorce, there is an opportunity to file anything, take legal action, or seek a sanction, but the better option is to postpone or avoid taking action. Your husband, for example, is an adulterer. You have concrete evidence. You may believe that because the opportunity presents itself, you must file a lawsuit for adultery. However, history has shown that assessing the circumstance and determining when or if such action is most useful is frequently the best course of action. The mere fear of litigation, for example, may be more persuasive in negotiations than the actual filing of litigation.

All of the preceding rules come with the proviso that no rule should be obeyed if doing so would be risky. You have to do some things from time to time. The key is to seek the advice of skilled counsel and to ensure that your relationship with your counsel is not hostile for the purpose of being contentious.

Rather of focusing your efforts on hurting your ex, be sure that every move you make is actually geared to assist you move closer to a positive solution, not just to grasp a purely temporary advantage or to gratify an unproductive emotion. Let’s keep it that way!

Need a Divorce Lawyer in Scottsdale or Phoenix?

As proven legal counsel in family court, we have a network of Arizona attorneys, expert witnesses, mediators, tax specialists, estate planners, financial planners, child specialists, real property appraisers, adult and child therapists and parenting coordinators who are here for you if you ever need them. Our lawyersdivorce mediators and collaborative divorce attorneys in Scottsdale are here to make your divorce less stressful and keep you in control and the costs contained. Call today for an initial consultation at 480-744-7711 or [email protected]. Our family lawyers can also help with divorce litigation, child custodylegal guardianshippaternityprenuptial agreements, and more.

*This information is not intended to be legal advice. Please contact Canterbury Law Group today to learn more about your personal legal needs.

How To Divorce Your Wife And Keep Everything
Written by Canterbury Law Group

How To Divorce Your Wife

How To Divorce Your Wife And Keep Everything

Divorce is a major life-changing event and can be devastating and traumatic for a family. If there are children involved, the divorce can have profound impacts on them, which they will carry with them their entire lives. However, if a divorcing spouse has a basic understanding of what the divorce process in Arizona will entail, he/she will likely feel a sense of comfort and be able to pass that on to the children.

  • A divorce action is commenced in Arizona upon the filing of a Petition for Dissolution. The Petition will include the filing spouse’s general positions relative to custody, division of assets and debts, financial support and attorney fees. The Petition for Dissolution must then be served upon the other spouse, who will have 20 days to file a Response.Once the initial pleadings have been filed, the next phase of a divorce begins. During the discovery phase, both spouses are required to disclose certain documentation that can be reviewed by the attorneys in order to make an assessment of what assets and debts exist and their respective values. In addition, formal discovery requests may be issued in this phase. Again, responses to discovery requests are primarily utilized by the attorneys to make an assessment of what and how assets and debts should be divided between the spouses. The discovery phase may also include depositions and requests for documentation issued directly to third parties.How long does a divorce take?In Arizona, a divorce can take anywhere from six months to one year to complete. This can be a difficult and unstable time for families because there are not yet orders in place relative to contact with the children, financial support and temporary possession of certain assets, including vehicles and the marital residence. Therefore, a spouse who needs assistance with these issues during the divorce process can file a Motion for Temporary Orders. Once this motion is filed, temporary orders can typically be issued by the court within 60-90 days and will stay in place until final orders are issued by the court or agreed upon between the spouses.

    Once the discovery process has been completed, then the attorneys and spouses can engage in settlement negotiations. There are several methods that can be used to negotiate and, hopefully, resolve a matter without costly, time consuming and emotionally tolling litigation. Depending on the facts and complexity of the matter, settlement negotiations can take place in correspondence between the attorneys, an in-person mediation through the court or during a private mediation. In the event that the spouses are able to negotiate an agreement, then the agreement will be incorporated into a final Decree of Dissolution, Property Settlement and Joint Parenting Plan.

    In cases where the spouses are unable to resolve some or all of the issues, it will be necessary to attend a trial where the judge will hear testimony from witnesses and review evidence. Ultimately, the court will issue the final orders for any matters that the spouses were unable to resolve amongst themselves. Once a trial is completed, the judge has up to 60 days to issue a ruling that sets forth the final orders. In some cases, the judge’s ruling is the final Decree of Dissolution. In other cases, the court directs one of the attorneys to draft a Decree of Dissolution that incorporates the rulings.

    Whether a divorce case settles or proceeds to trial, it is critical to have an experienced attorney on your side who can protect your rights and advise you as to what you may be entitled to under Arizona law.

Need a Divorce Lawyer in Scottsdale or Phoenix?

As proven legal counsel in family court, we have a network of Arizona attorneys, expert witnesses, mediators, tax specialists, estate planners, financial planners, child specialists, real property appraisers, adult and child therapists and parenting coordinators who are here for you if you ever need them. Our lawyersdivorce mediators and collaborative divorce attorneys in Scottsdale are here to make your divorce less stressful and keep you in control and the costs contained. Call today for an initial consultation at 480-744-7711 or [email protected]. Our family lawyers can also help with divorce litigation, child custodylegal guardianshippaternityprenuptial agreements, and more.

*This information is not intended to be legal advice. Please contact Canterbury Law Group today to learn more about your personal legal needs.

Written by Canterbury Law Group

Why Are Divorce Rates So High?

Why Are Divorce Rates So High?

What factors are associated with a higher risk for divorce? Read on to learn more.

  • Young age.  Marriage at a very young age increases the likelihood of divorce, especially in the early years of marriage.
  • Less education.  Research shows that those with at least some college education (vs. high school or not finishing high school) have a lower chance of divorce.   
  • Less income.  Having a modest income can help couples avoid stress that may lead to divorce.   
  • Premarital cohabitation.  Couples who live together before marriage appear to have a higher chance of divorce if they marry, but the risk is mostly true for those who have cohabited with multiple partners.  A common belief is that living together before marriage provides an opportunity to get to know each other better, but research has found those that live together before marriage have already developed some leniency towards divorce.   This leniency towards divorce is what leads the couple to become high risk. However, there are some caveats to these findings.  Research suggests couples who get engaged and then move in together are no longer at a high risk for future divorce.   Their commitment towards marriage reduces the risk of a future divorce.
  • Premarital childbearing and pregnancy.  Childbearing and pregnancy prior to marriage significantly increase the likelihood of future divorce.
  • No religious affiliation.  Researchers have estimated those with a religious affiliation compared to those who belong to no religious group are less likely to divorce.
  • Parents’ divorce.  Unfortunately, experiencing the divorce of your parents doubles your risk for divorce.  And if your spouse also experienced their parents’ divorce than your risk for divorce triples.  This does not mean you are predisposed to having your marriage end in divorce, only that you may need to be more aware of your marriage trends and work harder for a successful marriage.  For more information on what a healthy marriage entails click here.  

Need a Divorce Lawyer in Scottsdale or Phoenix?

As proven legal counsel in family court, we have a network of Arizona attorneys, expert witnesses, mediators, tax specialists, estate planners, financial planners, child specialists, real property appraisers, adult and child therapists and parenting coordinators who are here for you if you ever need them. Our lawyersdivorce mediators and collaborative divorce attorneys in Scottsdale are here to make your divorce less stressful and keep you in control and the costs contained. Call today for an initial consultation at 480-744-7711 or [email protected]. Our family lawyers can also help with divorce litigation, child custodylegal guardianshippaternityprenuptial agreements, and more.

*This information is not intended to be legal advice. Please contact Canterbury Law Group today to learn more about your personal legal needs.

Written by Canterbury Law Group

Stages Of Divorce

Stages Of Divorce

LIke grief, divorce has stages a person goes through. In this post we briefly review those stages. Read on to learn more.

Denial. 

It is often tough to accept that you are in the middle of a divorce and you may think the divorce was entirely your own fault. This can send you into a whirlwind of emotions and thoughts You may think there is something you can do to get back with your partner.

Shock. 

You may act in a way in an abnormal way. The shock of the divorce creates different emotions inside your head that may cause panic. This shock becomes more pronounced when you realize how much time you invested in your marriage and family.

Contrasting Emotions. 

It will be tough to control your emotions. From feeling hope to feeling simply nothing but despair, you will try your best to make sense of all that has happened leading up to this point. You may also find that all you think about is the failure of your marriage.

Bargaining.  

You are still hopeful that your marriage will work out. You are willing to do anything to change yourself and just make things work. You may resort to drastic measures just to get your ex to change his or her mind. What you will need to realize at this point, though, is that you cannot control the feelings of other people. Bargaining only delays the harsh reality of divorce

Letting Go.

 When you realize that nothing you say or do will bring your marriage back, you stop blaming your ex-spouse and start to understand your faults and what contributed to the end of your marriage. You may also feel a sense of freedom and a better outlook about what the future holds for you. You can finally let go and move on.

Acceptance. 

The negative emotions finally stop. You feel that you are finally fit to lead a life that is filled with happiness and satisfaction. This stage will accompany a time period of growth. You will finally understand that there is life after divorce, and that there are more positive things to look forward to in your life.

Need a Divorce Lawyer in Scottsdale or Phoenix?

As proven legal counsel in family court, we have a network of Arizona attorneys, expert witnesses, mediators, tax specialists, estate planners, financial planners, child specialists, real property appraisers, adult and child therapists and parenting coordinators who are here for you if you ever need them. Our lawyersdivorce mediators and collaborative divorce attorneys in Scottsdale are here to make your divorce less stressful and keep you in control and the costs contained. Call today for an initial consultation at 480-744-7711 or [email protected]. Our family lawyers can also help with divorce litigation, child custodylegal guardianshippaternityprenuptial agreements, and more.

*This information is not intended to be legal advice. Please contact Canterbury Law Group today to learn more about your personal legal needs.

Written by Canterbury Law Group

Divorce Consultation Checklist

Nearly all attorneys offer an initial consultation when you are about to embark on the divorce process. Here is a checklist of things to consider and items you may want to bring for that initial meeting. Download the Divorce Consultation Checklist PDF

  1. ❒ Get together a list of your assets and debts with the necessary documents showing the status of your assets and liabilities. Include individual and community assets and debts as well as all supporting documents.
  2. ❒ Get together a list of your expenses and income including community income and expenses as well as a copy of supporting documentation.
  3. ❒ Prepare a list of questions you want to ask the divorce lawyer. Making the most of your time with the lawyer on the first visit is of paramount importance.
  4. ❒ Bring in your tax returns, both individual and joint, if you filed jointly. Ideally, try to bring in the last two years of federal and state tax returns.
  5. ❒ If your spouse or you are self-employed bring all the documents you can regarding expenses, income, and documentation pertaining to the operations of the business or businesses. An up to date profit and loss statement and a balance sheet would be very relevant as would the previous years Schedule A tax return.
  6. ❒ Make a list (bullet pointing it is a good idea) of important facts and statistics about your family. Names of children, birth dates, anniversary dates and so on.
  7. ❒ Get a copy of the attorney intake sheet ahead of the meeting. This can allow you more time to concentrate on what you want to talk about and give your attorney a little extra time to consult with you live in person.
  8. ❒ Bring as much information about your spouse as you possibly can. For example, where they are employed, and pay stubs as well as facts regarding their persona. if your spouse has a history of mental health issues, raise these when you have the meeting.
  9. ❒ If you are already at the stage where a divorce case has been filed bring a copy of the documentation you have to the meeting, together with an additional copy of all the documentation for your attorney so it can be examined during the course of the meeting.
  10. ❒ Important and evidence and documents you may have are worth bringing. if you have social media info, emails, text messages and photos that contribute to the reasons why you are getting a divorce, bring all the documentation with you.

Source:

“10 Things to Bring to Your Initial Consultation with a Divorce Lawyer.” Wilkinson & Finkbeiner, LLP, 6 Feb. 2017, www.orangecountydivorce.com/10-tips-prepare-initial-consultation-divorce-lawyer/.

See Also

Divorce Checklist

Divorce Mediation Checklist

Amicable Divorce Checklist

Need a Divorce Lawyer in Scottsdale or Phoenix?

We have a network of Arizona mediators, attorneys, tax specialists, estate planners, financial planners, child specialists, real property appraisers, adult and child therapists and parenting coordinators who are here for you if you ever need them. Our divorce lawyersdivorce mediators and collaborative divorce attorneys in Scottsdale are here to make your divorce less stressful and keep you in control and costs contained. Call today for an initial consultation at 480-744-7711 or [email protected]. Our family lawyers can also help with divorce litigation, child custodylegal guardianshippaternityprenuptial agreements, and more.

*This information is not intended to be legal advice. Please contact Canterbury Law Group today to learn more about your personal legal needs.

Written by Canterbury Law Group

Divorce Checklist

Divorce is one of the most stressful and complex events one goes through during their lifetime. it is vital to not allow important matters to be overlooked. The following divorce checklist should help you to make sure you are on track to complete your case as efficiently as possible. Download the Divorce Checklist PDF

  1. ❒ Obtain a copy of your current credit report. Years after your divorce is over, you do not want to find out there is an overdue credit card statement in your name the divorce did not take into account. Of course, you still have a responsibility to pay debts you may have accidentally overlooked or forgotten. Consider getting a credit report at the outset and the end of the divorce process, too.  You should likewise ask for a copy of your spouse’s credit report.
  2. ❒ Have your U.S. mail redirected by getting a P.O. Box as soon as you commence divorce proceedings. Soon, you will start getting individual mail (attorney letters for example) you will not want your spouse to have access to. Keep in mind though, your spouse does have a right to mail addressed to both of you.
  3. ❒ Change passwords on your most visited websites, social media and other accounts you have online, for example, Amazon. You will also want to open up a new email address you have not had before.
  4. ❒ Find a good checklist for the documents you will need for divorce. Make sure you get copies of all the documents on the list ideally before starting the divorce process. Remember, before the divorce starts, it is far easier to get all your financial information. It is very important going forward, to have all your ducks in a row so you can proceed quickly and with the best possible information.
  5. ❒ Obtain a yearly calendar and record the dates of the parenting schedule. Mistakes are easy to make with schedules or incorrectly handling important dates unless you have it written down.
  6. ❒ Make a list of parenting issues so you can recall what is most important as you now have to deal with these important issues before the divorce. Some things to consider would include (first refusal for babysitting) how your spouse can access the information they may need to know regarding the child or children and so on.
  7. ❒ It is likely time to make a new will and decide upon new beneficiaries for your retirement accounts, investments, and insurance policies following the divorce process.
  8. ❒ When possible, deal with any outstanding health and medical issues before your divorce and that includes exploring options for your own health insurance policy for the future. The former is especially important if you have health issues needing regular attention and you are currently on the health insurance policy of your spouse.
  9. ❒ Before you start the divorce process, take items and personal property you consider to be invaluable and secure them safely in a place that is outside the home and ensure you get any remaining leftover possessions from your ex-spouse as soon as you can once the divorce has been finalized.

Source:

Covy, Karen, and Karen Covy. “How a Simple Divorce Checklist Can Keep You From Making These 10 Common Mistakes.” HuffPost, HuffPost, 12 Oct. 2016, www.huffpost.com/entry/how-a-simple-divorce-checklist-can-keep-you-from-making-these-10-common-mistakes_b_8271322?guccounter=1.

See Also

Divorce Consultation Checklist

Divorce Mediation Checklist

Amicable Divorce Checklist

Need a Divorce Lawyer in Scottsdale or Phoenix?

We have a network of Arizona mediators, attorneys, tax specialists, estate planners, financial planners, child specialists, real property appraisers, adult and child therapists and parenting coordinators who are here for you if you ever need them. Our lawyersdivorce mediators and collaborative divorce attorneys in Scottsdale are here to make your divorce less stressful and keep you in control and costs contained. Call today for an initial consultation at 480-744-7711 or [email protected]. Our family lawyers can also help with divorce litigation, child custodylegal guardianshippaternityprenuptial agreements, and more.

*This information is not intended to be legal advice. Please contact Canterbury Law Group today to learn more about your personal legal needs.

Written by Canterbury Law Group

Divorce Mediation Checklist

How Does a Legal Separation Work

Divorce mediation is a great way to reduce the pain of the divorce process but both spouses have to be honest and of course, it requires full disclosure from both parties to be successful. Although there may be many issues to tackle, some of which may seem overwhelming, this checklist will help you through the divorce mediation process. Download the Divorce Mediation Checklist PDF

Listing Your Assets

  • ❒ Gather relevant bio info for both parties. For example, the names, addresses and contact info for both parties. As well as the date of marriage, employment records and the gross annual income for each party.
  • ❒ The names and dates of birth of all the children you have together and whether they are over the age of eighteen or not.
  • ❒ Up to date statements for all bank, savings, checking, money markets, and CD accounts. Figure at least 12 to 24 months of statements.
  • ❒ Up to date statements for all bank accounts relevant to your child or children such as 529 plans, CD’s or college saving accounts.  The most recent statements are usually sufficient.
  • ❒ Up to date statements for all bond and stock investments.
  • ❒ List all your vehicles with their Kelley Blue Book value as well as the model and year of the vehicle.
  • ❒ List any lawsuits you have pending where you and/or your spouse are listed as plaintiffs.
  • ❒ Outstanding loan statements or a list of verbally made promises to repay loans where one or both parties are creditors.
  • ❒ Outstanding statements listing all the retirement accounts owned by each party. Examples would include 401 (K)’s, 457’s, 403(b)s, company pension plans, traditional and Roth IRA’s. SEP IRA’s and TIAA-CREF. In certain circumstances, they may need a valuation performed by a professional actuary to ascertain their current market value.
  • ❒ A statement listing employment-related benefits. For example incentive, stock options, golden parachute plans, and cash balance.
  • ❒ Appraisals stating the current market value of real estate individually or jointly owned. This would include, vacation homes, the primary residence, investment properties, timeshares, vacant real estate.
  • ❒ A list of personal properties in the home (or homes) as well as artwork, jewels, antiques or other objects that have a large financial value. It may be the case that special professional appraisals are needed if the value of items cannot be agreed upon.
  • ❒ The current market value of any businesses owned by one or both parties.

Listing Your Liabilities

  • ❒ Statements showing the current balances for all the mortgages, lines of credit or home equity loans for any properties that are individually or owned by both parties.
  • ❒ Motor vehicle loan balance statements held by both parties.
  • ❒ Student loan balance statements held by both parties.
  • ❒ Outstanding loan statements or a list of verbally made promises to repay loans where one or both parties are debtors.
  • ❒ Credit card balance statements for both parties.
  • ❒ All the information regarding civil lawsuits that are pending where one or both of the parties are named as defendants.

Income Details

  • ❒ Six months of income statements and/or pay stubs for both parties including 1099 and W-2 employment details.

Tax Details

  • ❒ Three years of federal and state tax returns and all of the relevant 1099 and W-2 statements.
  • ❒ If one spouse or both together had or have a business, three years worth of corporate tax returns.

Insurance Details

  • ❒ Life insurance policy declaration sheets for all of the policies held by both parties, including a statement expressing the value of cash surrender of any universal life or whole insurance plans.
  • ❒ Disability policies listed with their declaration sheet held by both parties.

Other Needed Documents

  • ❒ Marriage certificate copy.
  • ❒ Trust document copies.
  • ❒ Copies of wills that have been executed during the course of the marriage.
  • ❒ Copies of statements regarding pre-marital agreements, marital agreements or statements regarding pre or post-nuptial agreements.

If you have reasons to question the validity of the information the other party has provided you can raise those issues during the divorce mediation sessions. Rest assured it will be handled in a manner that is not confrontational, fair and will take into account the viewpoint of everyone. By collaboration and mediation, both parties would have pulled together all the information regarding your estate, usually in just a few weeks – as long as the information provided to the mediator is complete and accurate as it can be.

Source:

Pastore, Cris. “Get Ready for Divorce Mediation – A Complete 30-Item Checklist.” Get Ready for Divorce Mediation – A Complete 30-Item Checklist, www.mainlinedivorcemediator.com/healthy-divorce-blog/bid/107374/get-ready-for-divorce-mediation-a-complete-30-item-checklist.

See Also

Divorce Checklist 

Divorce Consultation Checklist

Amicable Divorce Checklist

Need a Divorce Mediator in Scottsdale?

We have a network of Arizona mediators, attorneys, tax specialists, estate planners, financial planners, child specialists, real property appraisers, adult and child therapists and parenting coordinators who are here for you if you ever need them. Our divorce mediators and collaborative divorce lawyers in Scottsdale are here to make your divorce less stressful and keep you in control and costs contained. Call today for an initial consultation at 480-744-7711 or [email protected]. Our family lawyers can also help with divorce litigation, child custodylegal guardianshippaternityprenuptial agreements, and more.

*This information is not intended to be legal advice. Please contact Canterbury Law Group today to learn more about your personal legal needs.

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