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My Wife Cheated On Me And I Want A Divorce

My Wife Cheated On Me And I Want A Divorce

Law offices across America often hear the refrain of: “My wife cheated on me and I want a divorce!” Thankfully in most situations we can help. Read on to learn the best way to negotiate through this difficult transition.

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One of the most mentally and psychologically painful experiences one can endure is when you discover your spouse has been cheating on you. The pain can endure for months as you come to terms with the situation. Understandably many men think the only option from this point is opting for divorce.

When Your Wife Cheats on You and You Want a Divorce

Your first port of call should be to speak to an experienced attorney. At this stage, you do not have to decide upon a course of action, but you should be aware of the options that are available. Similarly, just speaking to an attorney does not mean you will get a divorce, it just allows you the chance to obtain legal counsel regarding your current position. The attorney will explain the step by step process, should you decide on a divorce. They can also explain issues such as child custody and the division of property. You will also be made aware your divorce can go one of two ways, uncontested and contested. In short, a contested divorce is where the other party will not agree with the terms of the divorce you propose, and an uncontested divorce is when the other party does agree.

Does Infidelity Matter?

Since the advent of no-fault divorces, it means infidelity no longer has to be proven. However, the judge may take it into consideration if the acts of infidelity have had a negative financial impact on you. They may also consider the impact the infidelity has had on the child or children of the parents.

Property Division and Infidelity

Regardless of your wife cheating, it does not disqualify her from a property settlement. As Arizona is a state with a community property law, anything you acquired during marriage must be split evenly. The same applies to a division of debts, some will be considered separate and others will be considered community debts.

Alimony and Cheating

It is a fact, a wife who cheats will still ask for alimony in many cases. However, a court may offer her less alimony as it is based on financial need, if, for example, she has already moved in with her partner from the affair. You need to let your attorney know if the affair partner (or indeed any other party) is living with your wife before the divorce becomes finalized and of course, once the divorce is final.

Child Custody

A judge is always going to act in what they consider to be the best interests of a child or children involved in the divorce process. Sadly, courts will not always think your wife is a bad Mom, even if she has cheated on you. The only way something of this nature would come into play would be if her infidelity threatens the wellbeing of the child or children. For example, engaging in acts that can be described as sexual in nature around the children.

Sadly, many relationships can never bounce back after cheating. The damage is irreparable. But we are here to assist you in dealing with the relationship fallout following infidelity.

Source: “My Wife Cheated On Me and I Want a Divorce.” Maples Family Law, 17 Jan. 2019, https://www.maplesfamilylaw.com/divorce/my-wife-cheated-on-me-and-i-want-a-divorce/

Need an Affordable Divorce lawyer in Scottsdale?

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The Canterbury Law Group should be your first choice when you need the best divorce lawyer in Scottsdale or Phoenix, Arizona. Our experienced family law attorneys will work with you to obtain the best possible outcome in your situation.  Proven trial lawyers in family court, you can trust the firm to represent you fully so you can get on with your life. Call today for your initial consultation.

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Arizona Breastfeeding Laws & Visitation Rights Breastfed Babies

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If you are searching for Arizona breastfeeding laws or visitation rights for breasfed babies, this article might help. A recent news article about a judge ordering a breastfeeding mother to switch to baby formula to facilitate visitation for the father has reinvigorated an old debate. In a custody hearing in Maine, a father petitioned that his visitation rights were being violated because the mother is still breastfeeding the child. The estranged couple has a six-month-old baby that the mother is still exclusively nursing. The father wants overnight visitation rights on the weekends, but the mother refused on the account that she needs to breastfeed the baby.

The mother claimed that she couldn’t pump enough breast milk to arrange bottle feeding the baby when the infant is the father. So she claimed that the baby should be with her on the weekends. The magistrate court disagreed.  In the custody hearing, the judge sided with the father and said that keeping the baby for breastfeeding is “not a reason to prevent [the father’s] visitation,” and it could be “considered deliberate alienation” of the father. The court recommended overnight visits that would have the baby fed formula milk.

There are some other details to the case, but the core argument involving nursing mothers’ and fathers’ visitation rights has been percolating for some time. Pediatricians recommend breastfeeding babies for up to 12 months. There’s ample scientific evidence to suggest that babies should be breastfed to ensure their health and psychological well-being. The court cannot dispute these biological factors. However, when arranging parenting time for estranged spouses with infants, breastfeeding could become a hot-button issue.

While the case was adjudicated in a different state, it’s a common question that pops up in family court in Arizona as well. Arizona does not have specific laws with regards to how to handle parenting time for a breastfeeding child. In most cases, babies are kept with mothers so they can nurse on time. If the father wants to visit, then the visits are arranged for two or three hours in a manner that doesn’t disturb nursing. However, these arrangements can change due to court recommendations on what’s best for the child.

Ideally, the best way to handle a father’s visitation with regards to a nursing baby is for the estranged parents to discuss parenting time civilly. It’s strongly advised to obtain Family Law help in Scottsdale to devise a sensible parenting time plan in accordance with court recommendations, parents’ wishes, and, above all, the well-being of the newly birthed child. Fathers who want to spend time with nursing babies should first discuss arrangements with the mother, possibly with the help of a third-party mediator.

Of course, not all estranged parents would be able to sit down together and come up with a neat parenting time plan. In that case, going to court will be the last solution. However, judges decide visitation rights for fathers with newborn babies on a case by case basis. It’s unlikely and rare that a mother would be ordered to switch to formula if she doesn’t want to or is somehow unable to. As the law is not clear on this, only your lawyer will be able to present you with the best legal solutions for the situation.  And you never know, the Arizona judge to whom your case is assigned may end up agreeing with the judge from Maine.

Arizona Breastfeeding Laws

Many mothers wonder about breastfeeding in public. First, it is perfectly legal to breastfeed in public. In Arizona, the law clearly says a mother is entitled to breastfeed her child in public and is not subject to indecent exposure laws.

A.R.S. 41-1443

“A mother is entitled to breast-feed in any area of a public place or a place of public accommodation where the mother is otherwise lawfully present.”

A.R.S. 13-1402

“Indecent exposure does not include an act of breastfeeding by a mother.”

Your baby has the lawful right to eat wherever you are. Having an upset, hungry, crying baby will call more attention to yourself than breastfeeding your baby!

What clothing do I need for breastfeeding?

Nursing in public is easy. You don’t need a special type of clothes. You can wear a loose fitting shirt or top that you can lift from the bottom. When the baby latches, let the bottom of your shirt cover your breast. Your baby’s head and body will cover the rest. You can practice in front of a mirror until you feel more confident about nursing your baby in public.

Do I need to use a nursing cover?

Some mothers are a little more comfortable nursing under a cover, but you don’t have to. You can breastfeed at your discretion without a cover as described above, but it is fine to use one if it is going to make you more comfortable. Your local WIC clinic may be able to supply you with a privacy cover, or a lightweight baby blanket is also perfectly fine.

If I’m in a public place, where am I allowed to breastfeed?

You can breastfeed anywhere you are, like the corner market, dentist’s office, or even the drug store. If you feel uncomfortable and need privacy away from home, you can find a dressing room, a fast food restaurant booth, or a nursing/ lactation room that will give you the privacy you want.

What if someone complains and doesn’t approve?

If you are in a public place and asked to stop breastfeeding your baby, ask for the supervisor or manager in charge of the establishment. A lot of people are uninformed, but the manager should be able to educate their employees about breastfeeding. You should feel confident that your baby’s needs are being met and be proud that you’re breastfeeding and providing your baby with the nourishment he or she needs!

Source

  1. “Breastfeeding in Public: Making It Work!” ARIZONA DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH SERVICES, Arizona Department of Health Services , azdhs.gov/documents/prevention/nutrition-physical-activity/breastfeeding/breastfeeding-in-public.pdf.

Family Law Consultations in Scottsdale

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The Canterbury Law Group should be your number one choice for when you need a family law attorney. Our experienced attorneys will work with you side by side to achieve the best possible legal outcome. You can trust Canterbury Law Group to represent you fully, so you can get on with your life. Call today for an initial consultation!

*This information is not intended to be legal advice. You can contact Canterbury Law Group today to learn more about your unique situation.

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Divorce in Arizona | Laws | How to File

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If you are looking for information on divorce in Arizona, divorce laws in Arizona, or How To file for divorce in Arizona, this post should help!

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What Is A Divorce?

Known legally as “dissolution of marriage,” and colloquially as divorce, it is a court procedure to terminate a marriage. The party who initiates the divorce is known legally as the petitioner and the responding party is known as the Respondent.

What Is A.R.S.?

A.R.S is an acronym of Arizona Revised Statutes. It refers to a specific Arizona law when it is followed by “§”and a number. They can be found in any county law library and at www.azleg.gov/ArizonaRevisedStatutes.asp

What Is A.R.F.L.P.?

A.R.F.L.P is an acronym for Arizona Rules of Family Law Procedure. Any county law library has these rules and they can be found at: http://www.supreme.state.az.us/rules/ramd_pdf/R-05-0008.pdf

Grounds For Divorce In Arizona

Couples divorcing in Arizona have a few a couple of different options if they would like to end their marriage. If you are facing this sensitive legal process, continue reading to learn more about the different legal approaches that may be available to you. Learn more about the grounds for divorce in Arizona.

When Can A Petition For Divorce Be Filed?

As per A.R.S. § 25-312. your spouse or you can file for a divorce once either you or your spouse you have continuously resided in the state of Arizona for a minimum of 90 consecutive days.

To Get A Divorce What Reasons Must I Give?

You do not need a reason. Arizona is what is known as a “no-fault state”. This means neither spouse has to proffer an explanation for the divorce. Merely, one party has to assert the marriage is broken irretrievably and file the case. Should the parties have chosen what is known as a “covenant marriage” when they tied the knot or latterly converted their marriage to a covenant marriage, A.R.S. §25-903. states the party seeking divorce must prove the grounds contained in the statute.

Do I Need A Divorce Lawyer To Represent Me?

Everyone has the individual right to represent themselves in a divorce court. But understand, the court will expect you to follow the correct procedures and applicable laws to your case without allowances for your choice not to engage the services of an attorney. If correct procedures are not followed you run the risk of permanently losing certain rights as the case progresses. If the case has to go to trial and you do not follow the correct procedures, the judge may prevent you from calling witnesses or presenting certain evidence. Judges and court personnel are unable to supply you with legal advice. If you do not understand court laws, it is probably wise to contact an attorney for further assistance. There may be situations where a judge orders your spouse to pay a portion of the total of the fees for your attorney.

What is the Divorce Procedure In AZ?

  • One party files a petition for a dissolution of the marriage (a divorce) and also files initial related documents.  There are a total of 7 different legal pleadings which are mandatory when commencing an action for divorce.
  • Once this is filed, copies of everything are then served upon your spouse, unless the service is waived in writing and then such a waiver is then filed with the court. Once served with the initial legal papers, the responding spouse has 20 days (if served in Arizona or 30 days (if served outside the state of Arizona) to respond to the divorce petition.
  • If after 20 days the spouse has failed to file a response, the other spouse may apply for a default. Once the request for default has been filed, the other spouse has only 10 days to file a response or the divorce may be granted entirely on the terms laid out by the petitioning spouse.
  • At the end of a 60 day “cooling off” period, if no response has been filed, the petitioner can then obtain a “Default Decree of Dissolution of Marriage”
  • Should a response be filed and both parties come to an agreement regarding all outstanding issues, they can jointly submit what is known as a “Consent Decree of Dissolution of Marriage.” This document presents the complete terms of the agreement for the judge to sign as per A.R.F.L.P. Rule 45(B).What If My Spouse Does Not Agree To A Divorce?

What Happens if We Cannot Agree To A Divorce?

In the case where one spouse does not want a divorce, they may request the parties attend a meeting of conciliation with the court. The divorce will be held up for a period of up to 60 days while the mandator conciliation session takes place. If following the conciliatin meeting, no agreement has been reached to postpone or abandon the divorce, it will proceed. There are no additional charges to request an initial  meeting of conciliation.  The Court will assign an officer of the Court to referee your conciliation session.

What Happens if My Spouse And I Disagree During The Divorce Proceedings?

It may be that a judge will have to decide upon any issues your spouse and you cannot come to an agreement on, for example, spousal maintenance, division of property and child custody. In this case, you must request an actual evidentiary trial so your divorce can then be finalized.

Individual counties have different procedures for trials. it is worth checking with an attorney if you are not sure of how you can obtain a trial date. Many courts have forms and information either on their websites or in local law libraries.  Some courts also offer mediation services that are free.

How Long Does It Take To Obtain A Divorce in Arizona?

Following a 60 day “cooling off” period once your spouse has been served with the Petition for Dissolution of Marriage, the divorce may then be finalized and signed off by a judge. It cannot be finalized any sooner than this even if both parties are in total agreement. A trial date will be set if parties cannot come to a final agreement. The waiting time for this to take place will depend on the county, it can take as long as six to nine months before a divorce is finalized.  A trial can often require a year or more before conducting and attending the trial.

What’s Covered In A Decree of Dissolution Of Marriage?

  • Termination of the marriage.
  • Restoration of one’s prior maiden name (if wanted).
  • A determination of parenting, time, support and custody of minor children (if applicable.)
  • Spousal maintenance determination (if applicable.)
  • Responsibility assigned for debts incurred in the duration of the marriage and the affirmation of debts owed before marriage and who is responsible for them.
  • The division of property establishing property obtained during the course of the marriage and what was owned or owed prior to the marriage and by who.
  • A determination of the attorney’s fees and costs (if applicable.)

Can I Obtain Temporary Orders When The Case Is Still Pending?

In a pending divorce, you can apply for temporary orders for interim issues such as parenting time, child custody, spousal maintenance, child support, attorney’s fees, and costs as well as other matters. The procedures to do this are individual to the county where the action has been filed. Again, you will need to seek advice from an attorney if you are unsure of how to obtain hearings for your temporary order requests.

What’s A Preliminary Injunction?

This is a type of restraining order issued at the outset of every divorce proceeding. The preliminary injunction as it is known is issued against both parties and requires that neither party harasses the other, that community property is not sold or encumbered while the case is pending, that the minor children not be removed from the state without the other parents’ written permission or with consent from the court and it orders that all existing insurance policies are maintained (e.g. home, life, auto, healthcare coverages).

What If My Spouse May Become Violent or Has Committed Domestic Violence?

If violence from a spouse is a risk or if they have already become violent you can separately apply for an Order Of Protection. The forms to do this are free of charge and available at any Superior Court, City Court or from a Justice of The peace court. On the day you submit the Petition For Order Of protection Form, you will see a judicial officer. There is no charge to apply for an Order Of Protection. In an violent emergency call 911!

Is There a Court Mandatory Parent Education Program?

Yes, if the parties have a minor child or children together there is a court-mandated compulsory education program instructing on the impact divorce has on children. You may be eligible to have your service of process fees and court filing fees deferred or waived are available at no charge at the Clerk Of The Court office for each county.

Once you have filled out the forms, a judge will make a determination if fees will be deferred or waived. If fees are deferred you must make payments towards those fees as your case proceeds. If your fees are waived, you are not responsible for the payment of those fees.

Speak With One Of Our Divorce Attorneys In Scottsdale

(480) 744-7711
INITIAL CONSULTATION

Canterbury Law Group’s divorce attorneys in Phoenix and Scottsdale will advance your case with personal attention and always have you and your children’s best interest in mind when offering legal solutions. Our family lawyers can also help with divorce litigation, child custody, legal guardianship, paternity, prenuptial agreements, divorce mediation, collaborative divorce, and more.

We are experienced divorce attorneys and will fight for you to get you the best possible outcome for your situation. Our firm will represent you fully, so you can get on with your life. Call us today for an initial consultation! 480-744-7711 or [email protected]

*This information is not intended to be legal advice. Please contact Canterbury Law Group today to learn more about your personal legal needs.

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Grounds For Divorce In Arizona

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Wondering what the grounds for divorce in Arizona are? This post should help!

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Learn more about the different options for divorce for couples in Arizona.

Couples divorcing in Arizona have a few different options if they would like to end their marriage. If you are facing this sensitive legal process, continue reading to learn more about the different legal approaches that may be available to you.

What Are Grounds for a Divorce?

Before a court grants your petition for divorce, you must have a legally acceptable reason for your request. Each state’s grounds will vary, but typically, if you and your spouse have tried to work things out without a positive result, sometimes it’s enough reason for a judge to agree to your divorce petition.

Courts consider this as a “no-fault” divorce, which just means that neither spouse is responsible for the collapse of their marriage. In Arizona, couples only need to appease to the court that their marriage has suffered an “irretrievable breakdown” and the marriage is irreparable.  One cannot force the other spouse to remain married.

The only stop to a dissolution of marriage petition is that the marriage is not irretrievably broken. Unless your spouse can persuade a judge that you both want to still be married, even though you filed for divorce, the judge will grant your petition for divorce.

Fault and No-Fault grounds for divorce in Arizona include:

  1. The marriage is irreconcilably broken (the No-Fault ground) or, if the marriage is a covenant marriage (Arizona identifies what is deemed a “higher” form of marriage called a “Covenant Marriage”) the probable grounds for a Covenant Marriage are as follows:
  2. Either partner committed adultery.
  3. Either spouse is lawfully imprisoned.
  4. Desertion or Abandonment.
  5. Physical and/or Sexual Abuse.
  6. The spouses have been living separate and apart continually without reconciliation for at least two years prior.
  7. The spouses have been living separate and apart continually without reconciliation for at least one year from the date the order of legal separation was entered.
  8. Alcohol or Drug Abuse.
  9. Both parties agree to a termination of the marriage.

Fault-Based Divorce in Arizona

In the past 50 years, nationally each state has adopted some type of no-fault divorce, but some states continue to let parties to allege particularized grounds as a reason for divorce. However, Arizona only authorizes fault-based divorce if the spouses have a legally binding “covenant” marriage.

Covenant marriages are uncommon, and only three states—Arizona, Arkansas, and Louisiana —allow this option. Unlike traditional unions, which will enable couples to marry and divorce with very few restrictions, couples who wish to enter a covenant marriage must:

  • take part in premarital counseling
  • when petitioning for a marriage license, decide how they will handle divorce, and
  • agree to participate in pre-divorce counseling.

If the spouses demonstrate a valid covenant marriage to the court, a judge can only grant the divorce if the filing spouse confirms any of the subsequent grounds:

  • the at-fault spouse cheated on the other during the marriage
  • the at-fault spouse was involved in a felony, and the courts sentenced the spouse to imprisonment or death
  • either spouse deserted the marital home for at least 1 year before the requesting spouse filed for divorce
  • the at-fault spouse sexually or physically abused the petitioning spouse, a child, or relative of either spouse, or
  • the at-fault spouse has chronically abused alcohol or drugs.

What if My Spouse and I Agree to a Divorce?

Divorce is sensitive and can be complex, but it doesn’t have to be. If you and your spouse can start the divorce process agreeing on the more significant legal issues, like child custody, alimony, and property disbursement, you can request the court grant you an uncontested divorce.

Uncontested divorces don’t require a trial, so it typically means less time and a lot less money, even if both spouses hire lawyers.

Before a court can agree to your petition, both spouses will need to agree that the marriage cannot be salvaged. Also, you will need to present a mutual settlement agreement to the court that clarifies how you will divide your marital assets and debt, and whether either spouse will support the other with alimony, also known as spousal maintenance.

If you have children, you will have to determine which spouse will care for the children, how you will divide visitation times, and who will pay the child support.

Uncontested divorces only work if both spouses agree on each and every issue, if you disagree on any issue during the process, the court will proceed as if it’s a contested divorce. Contested divorces usually require a drawn-out divorce trial where a judge will decide on the major issues. A divorce trial often results in increased legal fees and more time in court.

What Are the Requirements for a Divorce?

Like a lot of states, Arizona has a residency requirement that you must satisfy before you file for divorce. Couples must show that at least one of the spouses has lived in Arizona for a minimum of 90 consecutive days before petitioning for divorce. In addition, there is a waiting period of at least 60 days from the time you file to the time when a judge can approve your final divorce papers. These requirements help prevent spouses from shopping around for states or judges they think will award a more suitable custody arrangement or property arrangement. Learn more about divorce in Arizona.

What Happens After a Divorce?

After you (or a judge) determine the final terms of your divorce, the judge will provide a signed copy of the judgment of divorce via a signed Decree. This legal document ends your marriage permanently, and will address the following issues:

  • parenting time, custody of the child and child support
  • alimony (spousal maintenance) payments
  • division of marital assets and debt
  • each spouse’s obligation for their attorney’s fees, and
  • any name change(s) (restoration of maiden name).

This final decree and judgment is a vital record, so keep it in a safe place and refer to it anytime you have any doubts about the details of your divorce.  You may also need the Decree in the future when refinancing mortgages or purchasing other assets insofar as a lender may want proof of your dissolution status.

Speak With One Of Our Divorce Attorneys In Scottsdale

(480) 744-7711
INITIAL CONSULTATION

Canterbury Law Group’s divorce attorneys in Phoenix and Scottsdale will handle your case with personal attention and always have you and your children’s best interest in mind when offering legal solutions. Our family lawyers can also help with divorce litigation, child custody, legal guardianship, paternity, prenuptial agreements, divorce mediation, collaborative divorce, and more.

We are experienced divorce attorneys and will fight for you to get you the best possible outcome. Our law firm will represent you fully in court, so you can get on with your life. Call us today for an initial consultation. 480-744-7711 or [email protected]

*This information is not intended to be legal advice. Please contact Canterbury Law Group today to learn more about your personal legal needs.

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How To Negotiate a Divorce Settlement With Your Spouse

How do I get a prenup?

If you are looking for information on the best ways to negotiate a divorce settlement with your spouse, this post should help! Here we show you what you need to know so you can get the best result possible from your divorce settlement.

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Most lawyers will say it is very unwise to even attempt to negotiate a divorce settlement with your spouse, primarily as most lawyers think they can better negotiate on your behalf.

And they often can…but not all the time. When a lawyer becomes involved, the lawyer of your spouse also gets involved. The result is two lawyers playing games with your assets and your future life while you pay them for the pleasure of doing so.

Also, even if the “big stuff” is being taken care of by the lawyer, you will still have to negotiate the “small stuff” with your spouse, household items, etc. The best way to negotiate a divorce settlement with your spouse is to:

  1. Check your finances
  2. Learn how the divorce system works
  3. Determine your needs and wants
  4. Plan for best & worst case scenarios
  5. Cooperate & compromise
  6. Negotiate a fair agreement
  7. Leave emotions at the door
  8. Develop settlement scenarios
  9. Make agreements
  10. Create a plan
  11. Make the agreement official

*This information is not intended to be legal advice. Please contact Canterbury Law Group today to learn more about your personal legal needs. 480-744-7711 or [email protected]

1. Check Your Finances

Prior to starting a negotiation, you must have a very clear understanding of your financial situation meaning you need to understand what you owe and what you own.

A financial advisor, if needed, can explain your finances to you. Having done that if you still do not feel comfortable talking finance, do not negotiate for yourself. You will likely lose more by yourself than the cost of a lawyer guided divorce negotiation on your behalf.

2. Learn How The Divorce System Works

Judges have a duty to place the reasonable needs of the children above either parent so unless they are shown an extremely good reason, the Court will make you comply with the child support laws of the state. This means establishing a set parenting schedule, allowing a full relationship with both you and your children. The Court will also insist your divorce settlement is fair and equitable.

One need not possess a law degree to understands the basics of divorce settlement negotiation. You can spend an hour two with a lawyer or a divorce educator. Make sure you do your homework before you initiate negotiations.

3. Determine Your Needs & Wants

Simple to say but many people never consider what is “fair” when thinking of what they need when in divorce negotiation. Often, they can express what they do not want but are less sure at describing what they do need.

You must know what you want if you are going to do the negotiations yourself. You will need a balance sheet and a budget. Once you know your needs and wants, rank them in order of importance to you. You are going to have to compromise but at least this way you can negotiate for what you need.

4. Plan for Best & Worst Case Scenarios

Here are two acronyms you need to know:

BATNA = “Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement.”

WATNA = “Worst Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement.”

In a divorce negotiation, BATNA and WATNA represent the best and worst things that may happen to you if the case cannot be settled and goes to trial.  Going to trial is expensive, unpredictable, and emotional.  Settlements are the contrary.

Ask your lawyer what will happen to your BATNA and WATNA should you go to trial. Once you have that information, you can decide if going to trial makes sense or not. If the WATNA of your spouse is worse than you could get at trial, there is little point to accepting their proposal.

5. Cooperate & Compromise

Knowing the wants and needs of your spouse is just as important as realizing your own wants and needs (Also helps if you can work out their BATNA and WATNA as well.)

The more insight you have into the above factors, the more you can negotiate in a manner ultimately satisfying both of you. Remember: Negotiation requires compromise and cooperation. The more win-win scenarios you create, the more likely you are to succeed in settling your case amicably and on the terms, you want!  Nobody walks away from a settlement in a divorce feeling happy, both sides must give to reach a fair and final result to enable both of your lives to resume.

6. Negotiate a Fair Agreement

You must be prepared to walk away if your spouse and you cannot settle on terms. This means you have to comprehend what you can and cannot live with before you commence negotiating. And if reject proposals fall short, you must have the courage to reject them and to proceed with litigation.  You must also ensure that you have the financial resources to wage that litigation if settlement cannot be reached.

A very important tactic of knowing your bottom line is reality testing it before it becomes your bottom line. When your bottom line is just not a realistic proposition, negotiating a fair agreement is near impossible. Clinging to desires that will never be met is ultimately futile and typically self-destructive.

7. Leave Emotions at the Door

Many people would rather a lawyer negotiate for them because you do need to keep your emotions in check when negotiating – it is also a reason why getting a therapist is a good idea when you are getting divorced.

Nothing is going to derail a good proposal quicker than resuming old arguments that have been had many times before. If things do become too heated, it is time for a break to let you and your spouse both cool down and resume your negotiations from there.  Perhaps break for the day and come back the following week, do whatever it takes to keep up the momentum towards settlement.

8. Develop Different Settlement Scenarios

With compromise being the key, remember if you can keep an open mind and be prepared to brainstorm alternatives, the likelihood leans towards settling your divorce amicably.

If you are not sure what alternatives and compromises you may have at your disposal, ask your lawyer. They can come up with multiple scenarios that might meet the needs of everyone concerned. Also, listen to the ideas of your spouse, the more options you have, the more likely you will find a settlement that works for everyone.

9. Make Agreements

Ideally, you and your spouse will negotiate in a neutral place. Set aside a couple of hours so no one is worried about missing an appointment should your negotiations overrun on time.

Your spouse and you also need to agree on who writes down what you agree on and whether agreements are subject to the approval of your attorney’s approval before they are finalized and signed.

There is nothing that will poison your relationship faster than if one party tried to change something after you were both under the impression the other party had agreed to previous terms.

10. Create a Plan 

Having goals is great but you need a plan to achieve your goals because if you do not the odds of you being successful go down dramatically.

A plan means knowing what you want from the outset and brainstorming different methods to get you where you want before you commence negotiation. It does not mean starting your negotiation with your bottom line. Start by asking for more, so you have something to give up. The best negotiations are where everyone feels as if they “won” something and they can live with what they lost in the process of reaching a mutually ratified and successful conclusion.

11. Hire a Divorce Mediator

If you haven’t already, consider hiring a divorce mediator or collaborative divorce lawyer to seal the deal and make the divorce final.   Many people attend mediation sessions with their own divorce lawyer in tow.

Why You Might Want To Negotiate With Your Ex (Or Soon To Be Ex)

You can save time and money by negotiating your own divorce settlement if you can do the negotiation.

Additional benefits lawyers often do not speak of using this method is known as “buy-in.”

If your spouse and you have been active in discussions from the outset regarding divorce negotiations, it is far more likely the divorce settlement will be ultimately accepted.

Family courts are full of people who have already divorced fighting with their former partners! If you think your divorce settlement was rammed down your throat, there is usually no issue trying to alter or modify it later, typically at high cost and fees for both parties.

The Dangers Of Negotiating For Yourself

Negotiating for yourself is full of pitfalls if you do not have the capability to negotiate or are unaware of what you must negotiate about – you can end up losing far more than you initially realized.

At least everyone fears that.  This where lawyers usually enter the picture, and for a reason.

However, negotiation with your spouse does not have to be tough. Plus, when your divorce is going slowly, the legal fees are racking up, you may have to negotiate with your spouse just to close the deal so you can both move forward with your lives and stop spending legal fees.

So even though you may think you would never negotiate with your spouse – you may find you have to, but do not worry, it happens all the time!

If you are still on speaking terms – it is worth the effort – but you need to know what you are doing.

Here are ten top tips to help with negotiating with your spouse or your ex.

Should You Negotiate Your Own Divorce?

Negotiating a divorce is not easy – it is not fun, but it is doable even if you lack a background in finance and you do not need a law degree.

So, if you and your spouse decided to give direct divorce negotiation a try, be prepared. Get some divorce advice from your attorney, go through the above ten tips and make sure you understand the basics of your finances and your legal options before you start. Know what you want and need, be flexible and have a plan. Know what the law does or does not allow for each disputed item.

if you do not wish to negotiate alone think about doing a collaborative divorce or hiring the services of a mediator. That way you have more backing when you must negotiate.

Be sure to analyze your options before you commence. Be honest with yourself about what you want to achieve. If you are incapable of standing up for yourself, it may be very foolish to negotiate a divorce settlement yourself.

If your spouse and you can remain civil and you are both ready to undertake the work to prepare and resolve your outstanding divorce issues, negotiating with your spouse will undoubtedly save you a great deal of time and money.

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How Much Does Divorce Mediation Cost?

How Much Does A Divorce Cost In Arizona?

How Much Does Collaborative Divorce Cost?

Collaborative Divorce In Arizona

Divorce Mediation Pros & Cons

Negotiate Divorce Settlements In Scottsdale & Phoenix

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We have a network of Arizona attorneys, tax professionals, estate planners, financial planners, child specialists, real property appraisers, adult and child therapists and parenting coordinators who are here for you if you ever need them. Our divorce mediators and collaborative divorce lawyers in Scottsdale can help negotiate your divorce settlement, make your divorce less stressful, and keep you in control. Call today for an initial consultation at 480-744-7711 or [email protected]

Collaborative Divorce, Divorce & Legal Separation, Divorce Mediation
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How Much Does Collaborative Divorce Cost?

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On average collaborative divorce costs $7,500. Collaborative divorce costs ranged from $5,000 to $10,000 per spouse in the US for 2019, according to Equitable Mediation. However, Canterbury Law Group has navigated many divorce collaborations for less than $10,000 in legal fees per spouse.  This is a far cry from the tens of thousands of dollars that other couples will inevitably spend in contested divorce litigation in a court of law, not to mention the high emotional cost in traditional divorce cases.

*Disclaimer – These collaborative divorce fees are always changing and this is not an actual quote. If you need an experienced collaborative divorce lawyer in Arizona, contact Canterbury Law Group today to start your initial consultation.

How Much Does Collaborative Divorce Cost in Arizona?

On average, Arizona collaborative divorce costs about $10,000 per spouse.

What is Collaborative Divorce?

Unlike traditional litigated divorce cases where both sides are dug in, and legal meters are running full bore each month, collaboration is quite the opposite.  A team of family law professionals is assembled and there is a group push towards resolution.  Usually completed after 3 or 4 group meditation sessions, and within 60 to 90 days, you will have your divorce in hand almost overnight compared to your friends and colleagues slogging their way through a multiyear litigated divorce costings them tens of thousands of dollars.  Do not be penny wise and pound foolish.  Society has evolved in all facets of life—including divorce, why keep doing things in a time consuming and expensive way, when instead you can go through a transformative process of collaboration where only you and your spouse make the big decisions, and not a stranger in a black robe.  Collaborate, do not litigate.

Learn more about Collaborative Divorce In Arizona

Affordable Collaborative Divorce Lawyers in Phoenix & Scottsdale, Arizona

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(480) 744-7711
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Canterbury Law Group should be your first choice for when you need the best collaborative divorce lawyers in Arizona including Phoenix and Scottsdale, Arizona. Our experienced Arizona family law attorneys will work with you to obtain the best possible outcome.  You can trust us to represent you fully, so you can get on with your life. Call today for an initial consultation!

Collaborative Divorce, Divorce & Legal Separation, Family Law, Scottsdale Divorce
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Get Your Finances Ready for Your Divorce With These 6 Tips

For some couples, no matter what they do to fix their marriage, the only option left for them is to get a divorce. Going through this process is not fun emotionally, mentally, or financially.

Divorces can quickly get messy when finance issues start to rear their head. Separating money between the two parties can cause many fights and resentment. However, it is a necessary and crucial part of the divorce process.

Although your divorce attorney in Scottsdale will have advice specific to your case, there are some general tips to help you get your finances ready for your upcoming or pending divorce.

Gather All Necessary Documents

You’ll need to gather all the documents that show what you and your spouse’s financial situation is like. It is a good idea to have a copy of things like your checking and savings account, any investments, loans, credit card statements, retirement accounts, and income tax. The more organized you are with your finances, the smoother the process is likely to go.  Plan on gathering up at least 24 to 36 months of statements for the past 2 to 3 years on all accounts.

Don’t Start Overspending

When you know that you’ll be getting a divorce, try to keep your spending habits either the same or more conservative. Deciding to go and spend all of yours and your spouse’s money before the divorce begins could certainly work against you once the case begins.

Ensure that the two of you have sufficient money set aside for the attorneys and anything else related to the divorce (e.g. expert witnesses).

Leave Large Financial Decisions for Later

Once a divorce is certain, it may be tempting to go and take your soon-to-be ex-spouse off of your life insurance, health insurance, or anything else that his or her name is on. You may want to hold off on that though.  Once the case begins, you are prohibited from canceling insurance coverage or joint accounts.  The judge will certainly want things to remain status quo until the case resolves.

Jumping too quickly into significant changes that remove your spouse could work against you in court. Many of those issues will need to be negotiated out during the legal proceedings. The judge takes issue with what you may have done without the blessing of the court and reward your spouse instead.

Make a note of Your Assets

It’s important that you have a clear picture of all the assets and liabilities you and your spouse possess. Make sure to note what is owned together and what you each bought before marriage. These documents will help you out when it is time to split things between the two of you.

Ask for Help

When in doubt, talk to your attorney for help on how to handle your finances during a divorce. He or she is there to help you navigate the case, so it is wise to take advantage of that. You will be able to get advice precisely tailored to your family wealth situation.

Start Budgeting

Once the divorce is finalized, you’ll be living without the help of your spouse. Especially if he or she was the primary income for the family, you likely will need to adjust your spending habits.

Start budgeting with only your income in mind. See how you will be able to manage all of your expenses and if you will need to bring in any additional revenue. By starting now, it will help prepare you for when the divorce ultimately concludes.  They all do.

Divorce & Legal Separation, Divorce Attorney, Divorce attorneys Scottsdale, Scottsdale Divorce, Scottsdale Legal Help
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Rediscover Yourself After a Divorce

Going through a divorce is no easy matter. It’s emotionally, mentally, and even physically draining. It’s easy to find yourself alone and wondering what went wrong that got you to this point.

One of the hardest parts of a divorce comes after signing the papers – rediscovering who you are. Many find themselves asking this question after years of putting other’s needs before their own. One is left wondering who they are and what they are going to do next with their life.

Whether you commenced the divorce or not, this new phase in your life can be looked at like a fresh start. Between your divorce attorney in Scottsdale, your friends, and your family, all of them can help you along your journey of rediscovering yourself after dissolution.

Get Lots of Rest and Recover

The first thing you should do is take some time to rest. You are likely to go through the grief process because the truth is, you’re losing many things as you go through a divorce.  Many years or decades may have been shared with your former partner. After final separation, you are likely to mourn the loss of that past life.

Give yourself time to go through the grief process and to rest. You will need to have the energy and peace to get yourself back up on your feet.  Think twice about dating new people right away.  Do not rush into the dating market.  You need to reset your internal clock and moral compass first.

Connect With Your Old Self

Change happens when you are with a partner for a long time. You start to pick up your spouse’s traits and sometimes have to give up ones too.  Not only that, many find themselves falling out of touch with certain hobbies and activities they used to enjoy before getting married.

After the dissolution, use this time to reconnect with your old self before marriage. What were your hobbies and favorite activities? What were you good at and what did you want to get better at? Start getting back in touch with the things you love.

Reconnect With Anything Given Up

As mentioned, there is likely something you would have not given up before entering a marriage. Maybe your spouse was allergic to pets, and you always had a dog around. There could have been a hobby you enjoyed that your partner didn’t. The things you used to love but have not looked at in quite some time, maybe a place to refocus your new time and energy now that you no longer have a life partner.

Try New Things

Not only are you rediscovering who you were after a divorce, but it is also a time to try new things. It could be anything that you’ve wanted to try, but never did when you were married. Make a list of all of the activities and adventures you wanted and start working through them.

Surround Yourself With Love

In the end, one of the best ways to rediscover yourself after a divorce is to surround yourself with friends and family that know you best. You may have found yourself becoming distant while going through the divorce process. Your friends likely don’t want to pick sides, or you don’t want to put them in that situation. However with the case now over, keeping in touch with your friends will help keep you uplifted, avoid the feeling of loneliness, and help get you back to the self you have missed for so many years.

Divorce & Legal Separation, Divorce Attorney, Divorce attorneys Scottsdale, Divorced Parents
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5 Factors That Can Spark a Divorce

When a couple gets married, chances are they aren’t planning to get divorced down the road. Unfortunately, divorce is quite common in the United States. It is a stressful and sometimes quite painful time for both parties involved.

There are many factors that can contribute to a divorce. Some have warning signs in which you and your partner can work on. Others, however, are out of your control and are the result of an unfortunate circumstance.

The Canterbury Law Group, your divorce lawyer in Scottsdale, came up with a list of some of the top factors that can spark a divorce.

Lack of Communication

The lack of communication in a marriage is typically at the top of any list when it comes to divorce. Having good communication is critical in any relationship, but especially in a marriage. Without communication, it is hard to tell what your spouse is thinking, how he or she is feeling, and the two of you need to address any concerns.

High Expectations

Another common factor in a divorce is when one partner has too high of expectations for the other. Whether it be due to finances, household chores, or making someone happy, if a spouse has unrealistic expectations of their partner, it can generate many issues. If someone feels like they can never be good enough for the other person, it can result in them being unhappy and inevitably wanting out of the marriage.

Finances

Money is another significant factor in a divorce. If both partners are not on the same page with their finances, it can lead to a lot of trouble down the road. If one spouse wants to keep spending on expensive items, but the other one wants to save for the future, the two of them are bound to clash. Having opposing views with finances can lead right to divorce.

Lack of Intimacy

Intimacy in a marriage is essential for staying close to one another. Having intimacy in a marriage means both physical and emotional. If one partner starts to withdraw from the other and it never gets fixed, it could lead to divorce. Having that strong physical and emotional connection will help keep a couple strong and connected.

Wrong From the Start

In some circumstances, the marriage may have ended the moment it started. Marrying for the wrong reasons (for money or something other than love and having a connection), will likely lead to divorce sometime down the road. For a successful marriage, it is essential that the person you choose is someone you genuinely want to be with for the rest of your life. If there is a hesitation, it could be a sign that it may not be the right person for you.

Marriages will have their problems at one point or another. However, that doesn’t mean a divorce will happen. Depending on how the couple handles martial problems and works to get past them, that will likely determine if a divorce is in the near future or not.

Spending quality time with each other, having those emotional and physical moments will help keep the connecting between both partners thriving. Communicating with one another will help to overcome issues before the turn into something more extreme.

Divorce & Legal Separation, Divorce Attorney, Divorce attorneys Scottsdale, Divorced Parents
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6 Ways to Help Your Kids Cope Through a Divorce

A divorce is not something you plan for when getting married. Unfortunately, many families face divorce at some point. Going through a divorce can be highly stressful for both parties involved, children especially.

Every divorce will affect kids in some way, whether it be through sadness, anger, frustration, or even worrying. However, as their parents, you can help your children cope with the divorce process so that they use this as a growing experience.

Talking with your divorce lawyer in Scottsdale will help to give you the best advice for your situation. There are also the following top six tips that you can use to help your children cope with a divorce.

Inform the Kids of the Divorce

It’s not an easy conversation to have, but it is essential to talk to your children about the divorce. They’ll need to know that mom and dad will be living apart. Explain why you made this decision and that it was never caused by them. Keep the conversation appropriate for the age, temperament, and maturity of the child. Stay positive, stay optimistic—do not drench the children in negativity.  To the contrary, tell them they have a new optimistic life ahead.

Let Them Speak

It’s important that kids can express how they feel in these types of situations. This will mean the parents, both if possible, sit down and listen to them and acknowledge their feelings. If they are struggling, help them put how they feel into words.  Provide the children with counseling if needed.  They must repair their internal feelings immediately to avoid long-term emotional scarring.

Be Their Support System

Although you’ll have so many things going on in your life with a divorce, it’s crucial that you remain a strong support system for your children. Be there for them, talk to them, ask what will help them feel better.  Do NOT complain about the divorce, or your spouse, or the lawyers or the court—these kids have enough to deal with if you must vent, do so with capable adults, not your own children.

Keep Your Emotions in Check

If your children see you upset or stressed out, it will start to seriously affect them. As their primary emotional support system, trying to be as calm and collected as possible will be more beneficial in helping your children cope with the divorce. Approaching the situation angry and frustrated will only get them agitated.  Vent your deeper feelings on your own time, in your own space, and not within the sight line of your kids.

Be Kind to Each Other

Kids hear, see, and remember almost everything. You would be shocked to walk in their shoes for 24 hours.  If they see you and your partner actively arguing, or if you’re speaking poorly about your life partner when they’re not around, there’s a good chance that they’ll pick up on these things. Being kind and civil to each other will help prevent putting your kids in a difficult situation, or feeling like they need to choose sides.  Take the high road.  Stay silent when the kids are in the room and handle your “adult business” only with adults in the room.

Reassure They Are Loved

In the end, it’s important to reassure your kids that they are always loved by both parents no matter the divorce outcome. Explain the new living arrangements and express that while you’re with one parent, the other parent still loves them.  Money and property rights come and go, your children are the bedrock of your life today and into the future.

Divorce & Legal Separation, Divorce Attorney, Divorced Parents, Family Law, Family Law help in Scottsdale
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